present tense

there will eventually come this day we bid farewell, and i refer to you thenceforth in the past tense. like, 'she used to do this...', 'she used to do that...', 'she was like this...', 'she was like that...'. i know when that happens i'd live with much regrets of what-could-have-beens. it's not about doing enough or not. there are many ways of doing things, many of which may be incomprehensible to outsiders, and what's considered enough is too relative and general as to be relevant here. but what i will not know is the way you, or fate, or god choose to remove your present tense from the both of us, and everyone else. i certainly hope it will be the most normal and painless of partings - though a most wishful thinking. i also hope you'd learn to look after yourself properly, sometimes be a bit more selfish than you prefer to be, for it do you good. and finally, if it's not too late to tell you, that i love you. i always do.